Ramadhan Datang Lagi...

Today is the 1st Ramadhan..Without realizing, it has been a year since the last one..Rasa cpt sgt..Mcm bulan puasa yg dulu baru je jugak lagi habis..Tup2 dah bulan puasa 2010..Gossshhh..So talking bout this Ramadhan..I feel so blur..Feels like it's another Ramadhan to be furnished with fasting, terawikh n tadarus..No anticipation at all.. I in fact don't have any excitement of going to PARAM (psr ramadhan).. Xde plan nak beli makan tu, air ni..Just looking forward for a simple nasi n lauk for buka puase..Why am I being this way??.. Sudah tuakah..Or maybe kesan Ramadhan yg lalu..

Ye..Ramadhan thn lps mmg ssh nak lupa..Ramadhan with joy n sorrow.. But more with sorrow..In fact..More pain..Ramadhan thn lps...I was in the middle of such an emotionally unstable condition..Sebelum start Ramadhan thn lps..Hari2 badan aku x jejak ke tanah..Fikiran melayang..Bila msk Ramadhan..Awal2 puasa tu..Bgn shr selalu agk awal sbb tido x lena..Terganggu dgn mimpi2 yg menggusarkan..My terawih full of tears..Tiap2 kali sujud rasa xleh nak bgn blk..As a matter of fact at that time..Hati aku sgt x tenang.. Jiwa aku sgt kacau.. Fikiran aku mcm nak gila..Semua disebabkan 17 Julai 2009..But as Allah always promise..Ramadhan is a blessful month among all..Time Ramadhan thn lps la aku mula dpt ketenangan hati sikit2 lps lebih sebulan mcm nak gila..Dlm pertengahan puasa..Terasa Allah bagi ketenangan, kekuatan..Dan sampai kini..I can manage all the frustration and misery along the way walaupun kdg2 keserabutan tu timbul..Tapi Ramadhan thn lps la permulaannya..

This Ramadhan..Of course feel much better..And wanna enjoy the month to the fullest..Joined the Faculty tadarus team..Insyaallah akan ada geng buka puasa bila mahu (Tini Awang kamula sape lagikan..Hahaha).. Dah ganti kebanyakan kelas so will have much time to do my own works..

This Ramadhan..I will become a year older..And as a matter of fact.. I feel old already..Membygkan PARAM yg serabut, sesak dgn org n merimaskan sampai xde rasa nak pegi pun is good enuff to indicate my age crisis..Huhuhu..

Selamat menyambut Ramadhan...